Mark and Nicki

Discipleship starts at different points in every individual’s life. Every person is different. We all begin our spiritual journeys at different starting points. Therefore, discipleship has to be customized. One size DOES NOT fit all. Discipleship is not a formula. It’s not a set recipe. People are not computers and no discipleship program will upload into the human heart and bring people closer to God.

No, it takes time.

Relationships must be formed.

And everyone is different.

So in order to bring someone into a deeper understanding of Christ, we must find out where they are and meet them there. You catch fish on the fish’s terms. You reap the harvest on the harvest’s terms. From that point, you build an authentic, loving friendship with them. Even if they don’t say the “sinner’s prayer,” your love for them makes the relationship continue.

I personally don’t try to build relationships just for the purpose of selling Jesus to someone. People can smell that a mile away. Have you ever thought that someone really cared for you and wanted to be your friend only to find out later that they wanted to sell you something? Isn’t that discouraging? Frustrating? What do you think about that person after their real motive is discovered? Do you see them as phony? Pretenders? Posers? Repulsive?

We need to love people and build authentic relationships with them whether they accept Jesus or not. We shouldn’t have ulterior motives and be trying to sell them something. Loving people where they are for no other purpose than to help them in their life’s journey is what it means to truly be a “friend of sinners” just like Jesus (Matthew 11:19 & Luke 7:34).

Consider these four stories from the Bible and think about the relationships in your life – the people you work with, go to school with, socialize with, watch soccer games with and even live with…

• #1: Jesus on the Road to Emmaus: In the Book of Luke, there is a story of two men walking from Jerusalem to the small town of Emmaus. They were discussing the weekend events that just happened in Jerusalem. Jesus, a man they thought to be a prophet and perhaps even Messiah, had been arrested and executed. As they spoke, the resurrected Lord (incognito!) joined them on their journey and spoke with them about how those recent events correlated with the scriptures. For the next few hours, they journeyed together while Jesus discipled them, making sense of current events.

Many people are already headed in the right direction. In order to disciple them, you must be willing to join them on their journey and walk awhile, explaining why things in the world are like they are, making sense of current events and helping them see the world from a Biblical perspective. Using the scriptures as a template is a good way to help people see clearly how God has been interacting in their lives all along. But first, a genuine connection must be made.

• #2: Philip and the Ethiopian Official: A similar episode happened to Philip, an evangelist in the Book of Acts. After finding great acceptance among the people of Samaria, God lead him into the desert where he connected to a man who was traveling in his chariot back to his hometown in Egypt. The Egyptian, who was an officer in his nation’s government, was reading from the Book of Isaiah. Philip asked if the man understood what he was reading. He did not. So Phillip volunteered to join the man on his journey and explain to him what the Bible meant. As the two men traveled together for an unknown length of time, Philip discipled him to a place where he understood that Jesus was the Messiah.

Like the two men on the road to Emmaus, someone was willing to connect to this foreigner where he was on his journey and lead him into a deeper understanding of God. Disciplers can’t be prejudiced. We cannot allow ourselves to be judgmental about people and their beliefs. The Egyptian was not of the same nationality as Philip. He had different political views, social views, racial views and cultural views. But none of that mattered. The Bible became the focus of conversation and Philip was wise enough to discern what God was already doing in the man’s life and he continued that work until he was ready to take the next step in his journey.

• #3: Ananias, Barnabas and the Murderer: Saul was on a journey. He was on the fast track towards becoming one of the greatest Pharisees in Israel. But that journey took an unexpected turn one day when a certain blasphemer named Stephen received the death penalty. Saul was invited to the execution. While stones were pelting his body, Stephen spoke with anointed eloquence. Standing near him, Saul heard him pray for his murderers. In this dramatic moment, Saul was put on a new journey whether he realized it or not, one that would eventually make him one of the greatest apostles to have ever lived.

Not long after Stephen’s death, Saul was dispatched to the city of Damascus to arrest Christians. In the middle of a hot day just south of the ancient city, Saul was about to have an encounter with God. No doubt along the way, the nagging memory of how Stephen died, praying for his murderers, must have echoed in his mind and conscience. Out of nowhere, it seemed, Jesus appeared to him on the road and spoke to him about his journey. After this dramatic encounter, Saul proceeded to Damascus where a man named Ananias cooperated with the Holy Spirit and connected to him where he was. Ananias prayed for him and prophesied the purpose for which Paul had been created.

After Paul’s conversion, another man came into his life to help disciple him. Barnabas, whose name means Encourager, connected to Paul and introduced him to other leaders in the church. At first, they were reluctant to receive one who had been so notorious for killing Christians. But because Paul was now connected to Barnabas, the leaders of the church trusted him and welcomed their new brother into fellowship.

There are people who have dramatic encounters with God every day. These aren’t perfect people and their experiences aren’t always on Sunday mornings between 10 a.m. and noon in a church building. We need to remember that God is operating on people 24/7. What these individuals are looking for is someone who will connect with them on their journey and disciple them into the faith. They need a new network of friends. They need someone with courage, love and patience; someone who will not be offended with their current way of life and coach them into something different. They need an Ananias who can speak to their future and a Barnabas who is willing to help get them there.

• #4: Apollos and the Married Couple: Apollos was an eloquent man but he had a problem. His knowledge of the work of Christ was incomplete. He needed someone to come alongside him and teach him the finer points of experiential theology. About this time, a married couple named Aquila and Priscilla connected with him on his journey and explained to him the way of Christ more accurately. After their encounter, Apollos became one of the primary leaders of the early church.

One of the most effective ways to disciple people is working with your spouse. Married people make the best disciplers; because together, they can raise spiritual children as naturally and as affectively as they raise their own physical children. The family dynamic is already built in and comes across as the man and woman share their hearts from two different perspectives. My wife Nicki and I have thoroughly enjoyed connecting with people on their spiritual journeys and parenting them through the twists and turns of life. We regularly disciple young couples in our church.

You are also called to be a discipler. There’s no doubt about it! God wants to use you like He did Jesus when He met the two men on the road to Emmaus and helped them make sense of their circumstances. He wants to use you like He did Philip when he joined the Egyptian who was reading the Bible and helped him on his spiritual journey. Like Ananias and Barnabas, God wants you to be in tune with Him as He works in people’s lives and be willing to risk befriending people that others won’t. And like Apollos, there are people who need you to share with them your knowledge and experience in order to help them move into something greater.

Are you ready to connect with them?

dd.

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You’ve got to get connected! That’s all there is to it.

But you know that already, don’t you? How many times have you heard it? How many times have you said it? Yet here we are waiting for the Lord’s people to become one. I’ve heard it said that there shouldn’t be any lone rangers in the church. Yet thousands of people are still riding the ranges of life, all alone, wearing their masks and sporting their shiny new revolvers. They’re all dressed up with no place to go… Don’t be that person!